What's Wrong With This Picture?

Natalie got this out of the prize box at the library today. It's a glider and I think it's a beetle. See if you can figure out what is oh so very wrong with this prize. :)

Two Words You Should Never Use at a Funeral

Those two words are "death" and "kill." But leave it to me to find a way to work those two words into two different sentences.

The Setting: My friend's husband's funeral (he was in his early 30's. He died from cancer....this was years ago.)

The Scene: Receiving line with my friend and all of her close relatives in line.

The Humiliation:

My friend to me: (I'll change her daughter's name here for their privacy) "Kelly just adores Amanda (my daughter)."

Me: "Oh, the feeeling is mutual! Amanda loves Kelly to death!" (in my head I'm shouting at myself "WTF was that?!!!!!!!!")

My friend: "We'll have to have her over for a sleepover one night."

Me: "Amanda would KILL to be able to sleep over with Kelly!"

I walk away with an oft repeated refrain to myself playing in my head: "I am such a loser."

Britney Spears Does Demi Moore

Denise Richards Uses Semantics to Excuse Her Poor Choices

First, let me give you a moment to recover from the horror of what you see in the photo above. What was she thinking?!!!

Okay, so what does Denise Richards have to say to those who criticize her for dating her best-friend's husband?

"You know, she wasn't my best friend. She was a close friend in the last couple of years"

Ooooooh! Okay! HUGE difference there, Denise. Thanks for clearing that up!

Star Jones Reynolds Calls Barbara Walters a "Hypocrite"

Oh, The View Feud rages on, and it just gets juicier and juicier. Now comes this story from People reporting that Star called Barbara a hypocrite.

Did you ever see Kathy Griffin's stand-up show "Allegedly"? She jokes about her experience on The View and how Barbara Walters treated her (like shit). So I tend to side with Star on this one. I don't see what she did wrong.

However, I did find this statement hilarious:

"I thought the audience deserved to have their Star tell them what the deal is."

Their Star?!!! Okay, that's just crazy. I have never watched the view and thought of Star Jones Reynolds as "my star."

But I still think Barbara is in the wrong here and is showing her true, arrogant colors.

True or False

FlipFlopMomma tagged me on this, so here goes!

True or False:

I am a cuddler: True. What woman isn't?

I am a morning person: Oh my gosh, so VERY false!

I am a perfectionist: False.

I am an only child: False. I have one older half-brother by my father that was given up for adoption. I met him for the first time years ago. I have a half-sister and half-brother by my mother that are 15 and 16 and I consider them full-blooded siblings and love them to death! (I sound like I could be on Jerry Springer, don't I?)

I am currently in my pajamas: False. I got lucky on this one because a lot of days I still am!

I am addicted to my blog: Hmmm....maybe. Can you take a break if you're addicted? Then again, I am posting, just not responding to comments or visiting blogs (well, except today I tried to get some visits in)...okay, maybe I'm not taking a real break so I guess the answer to this would be "true!"

I am shy around people at first: True, but you wouldn't know it because I hide it well.

I bite my nails: False.

I can be paranoid at times: True

I currently regret something I've said: Wow. I can't believe I can say false to this!! False! Normally, it would be true because I'm always saying stupid stuff.

When I get mad I curse frequently: Very true!

I Like someone: Like? Define like. If it's the normal definition, who in the world would ever answer false to that?

I enjoy country music: Sometimes, but not often.

I enjoy jazz music: False

I enjoy smoothies: True! I was just about to make one now!

I enjoy talking on the phone: False, false, false! I hate the phone!

I have a lot to learn: False. No, I'm totally kidding. Who doesn't?

I have a pet: False. I have two pets. A bunny and a doggie.

I have a secret I'm ashamed to reveal: True. Not elaborating on that one any further!

I have all my grandparents: False. But I still have the one that means the most to me...my maternal grandma. I don't know what I'd do without her.

I have been called smart: True, of course. :)

I get higher than c's in school: Well, I'm not in school anymore, but when I was, I got higher than c's when I "applied myself" which wasn't often. I was more interested in the social scene than in academics, unfortunately.

I have broken a bone: False.

I have caller ID on my phone: True.

I have bathed/showered with someone: True.

I have changed a diaper: True, only about eighty million times!

I have changed over the past year: True.

I have done something illegal: True.

I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color: True.

I have had surgery: Ha! True, only about eighty million times!

I have killed another person: True. (LOL!! Just wanted to see if you were paying attention! Of course it's false!)

I have had my haircut in the last week: False.

I have kissed someone I knew I shouldn't: True...okay, repeat after me...only about eighty million times!!

The View Feud - Star Jones Reynolds vs. Barbara Walters

ABC to Star Jones Reynolds: "Get your lawyer ass out of here NOW and don't come back!"

Well, not in those words exactly, but that's what they meant!

After Star announced on Tuesday's edition of The View that she would be leaving the show in July, the network got pissed and told her not to come back.

And this is what Star has told People magazine exclusively:

"What you don't know is that my contract was not renewed for the tenth season. I feel like I was fired." She adds that she got the news just days before reports surfaced that Rosie O'Donnell – one of her most vocal critics – would be joining The View in the fall.

Star didn't show up for today's edition of The View. And now, Barbara Walters is saying she felt betrayed by Star's comments.

Take a look at this quote from Walters:

Walters's on-air statement echoed what she told PEOPLE Tuesday: "Bill Geddie (The View's coexecutive producer) and I said to her, 'Handle this any way you want. You can say anything about a new job, you can say anything about a new road. Whatever you say, we'll back you up. We will never say that your contract was not renewed.'"

Wasn't that so nice of them? Gee, they gave her all the room in the world to lie for them and pretend that Walters and Geddie were innocent and didn't fire Star. How could she "betray" them and tell everyone the truth about why she was leaving and make Walters and Geddie look bad?!!! What about her "dignity?"

Geez. With that kind of attitude, I say Star is much better without them!