Dec 14, 2008

Christmas Tree

I had an idea come to me that I believe in my heart was spiritually inspired. I won't get into the how's or why's, but I will share with you the gift I feel that my step-FIL wanted me create for my MIL.

As many of you know, I was by his side when he passed last year. It was one of the hardest moments of my life. I have felt connected to him more than ever since that time, though.

We all still feel his loss so deeply. Just the other day, Natalie said to me, "Mom. He said that they'd take me to the next race (he raced with his Ferrari). But I never got to go." That last race, he'd taken Amanda and Matthew but Natalie was too young. Hearing her say that broke my heart.

Then, I was going through old videos we have, and there was one of him kneeling down to help Matthew open one of his gifts several Christmases ago. He was SO excited for him, all animated and lively. He was so much fun. And wow did he love my kids. Like his own. Hearing his voice and seeing him just felt like a punch in my stomach. It physically hurt.

On to the MIL recently sold her house after it being on the market for forever. The house she last lived in with him. She's now in a brand new condo.

We have a tree planted in our yard in memory of him. So the idea came to me (again, I believe it came from him...if I could explain how it came to me, you'd understand) to do a painting of the tree to give to her so she can have that to remember him by in her new home. A gift from him to her, though. Not from me.

So even though I was terrified to try to do the painting (I was so afraid of making it look horrible), I sat down last night and went to work. I sketched the tree from a photo I had. Then used my watercolors. This is what I ended up with:

(You can click to enlarge) Ignore the shadows on the glass.

It wasn't as awful as I was afraid it would be....I think I captured the tree fairly well.

I really can't wait to give it to her on Christmas Eve. I just wish he could be there with us instead.


Me said...

What a wonderful gift Dawn! The painting is beautiful! :)


Giggle Pixie said...

You totally rock. What a beautiful idea, and you definitely captured the image in all its glory!

Tug said...

That's beautiful! I'm sure she will absolutely love it. ;-)

BlondeBlogger said...

~Trace, GP, Tug= Thank you so much! I really hope she likes it!

Season said...

Absolutely beautiful! What a wonderful idea and so thoughtful. Do you paint often?

Sharon - Mom Generations said...

The tree is exquisite... it is simply perfect. I, too, believe that it is divinely inspired, and I know that he will be there when you give it. This is a true gift from heaven, and this may be the reason that you are in each others' lives... for moments like these to carry on the love through you.

I could just cry at the beauty of the thoughtfulness.

Letera said...

OH that is so sweet. You did an awesome job! She will love it. You sound like me when my ex's father was dying. I was the last one to spend time with him. Feed him and clean him. I miss him out of the whole family except for one other cousin. Thanks for making me smile!

Anonymous said...

Great job. She'll love it because you made it and because of the meaning behind it.

Pamela said...

those are the best kind of gifts

BlondeBlogger said...

~Season- Thank you! I don't paint as often as I'd like to just because I'm so busy. But every now and then I'll pull out the paints and create a little something. Same with crocheting. There aren't enough hours in the day for fun stuff!

~Sharon- Aww, thank you so much! You always say the most lovely things! I believe he'll be there with us, too. Without a doubt. :)

~Letera- I can imagine how hard that was for you. There was a time in the end where I was left alone with him to care for him as well and, well, when someone is dying from lung's not a pleasant sight. It's a memory that I choose to push into the back of my mind.

The weird thing, though, is that when he actually passed, it was a very surreal, bittersweet moment. To be there when a soul passes from this world to the next is both a curse and a blessing. I was honored to be there, holding his hand, but it was also one of the hardest moments of my whole life.

I'm sure you can relate. I'm sure your ex's father will be with you in spirit, too, and I'm sure he misses you just as much as you do him. *hug*

~Step- Thank you! And it's so good to "see" you! I know we haven't chatted for awhile in blogland.

I haven't been able to make my blog rounds in a long time so I really miss my friends. It was wonderful to see your comment!

~Pamela- I agree. I love sentimental gifts. My favorite being the necklace my husband gave me 20 years ago. It was two hearts intertwined together with a diamond in each, since our song then was "Two Hearts" by Phil Collins. :)